174. Secret Agent 2

[To recap the first chapter of this novella: Zoe Dog, having intel that the notorious Madame X, aka Kimberly Titibomb, was reemerging froom seclusion to again engage in illegal trafficking, lured her to Lisbon with the promise of a diamonds transfer. They met at the Fabrica da Nata Cafe where an intense exchange insued.]

Now enjoy the conclusion of "Secret Agent".

The moment of reckoning was at hand. Zoe Dog, with her deadly throat chomp, was ready to pounce. Kimberly Titibomb thought about pulling out her revolver. Then she stopped, knowing that Zoe Dog was much faster than her. She slowly rose from her chair and backed away.

"Why don't we try to work this out as civilized people, er, rather as a civilized person and er, a civilized dog," she said. "I'm rich, so name your price. C'mon now, we can do this without bloodshed."

Zoe Dog hesitated for a moment and then said, "The atrocities you have committed out weight any price you can offer. You must be stopped and that's that."

Zoe Dog pounced and dropped Titibomb to the floor. She then chomped Titibomb's butt so hard that blood shot out all over the place. Titibomb screamed and tried to crawl under a table. Zoe Dog would have none of that. She grapped Titibomb's ankle and dragged her onto the middle of the floor.

Titibomb was desperate. She reached for her revolver, but Zoe Dog chomped her arm to the bone. Titibomp screamed again. "Let me go," she said. I'll give you everything I have, including my condo in Hawaii, my yacht, and my timeshare in Acapulco. I'll also throw in the diamond ring Im got from Elizabeth Taylor's estate—it's a big sucker. Please don't kill me!"

Zoe Dog sat on Titibomb's back and took a few minutes to settle down. Then she began to think about what would be best to do. "I need help with this one," She thought to herself. So she called her friend Meursault.

He answered the phone and said, "Bonjour, c'est Meursault."

Zoe Dog replied, "This is Zoe Dog Meursault. I need your help."

Meursault replied, "Of course mon amie. What is going on?"

Zoe Dog related to Meursault what had happended at the cafe and then said, " Look Meursault, I'm not a killer, well I'm a killer when it comes to rodents, and I even eat them on occasion, but not when it comes to people. I don't kill or eat people. I've got Titibomb under control, but I don't know what to do with her."

Meursault said, "Let me think about this."

Zoe Dog waited.

Finally Meursault said, "I've come up with three options. We could take her out to sea, tie a couple of cinder blocks around her waist, throw her overboard and drown her ass. That's number one, which I kind of like.

Secondly, we could sell her to that pig on two legs, you know, that Kim Jong-un guy in North Korea, where she would become one of his sex slaves. Hmm, I like this option better than the first one.

And finally, we could take her back to the States, cut off her toes so she couldn't run away, put a tracking bracelet on her ankle and find her an entry level job at a Walmart."

Zoe Dog replied, "I like the third option the best. She wouldn't die but instead would have to live a humiliating life stocking shelves, sorting produce and canned goods, and eating shitty Walmart deli food during her lunch breaks. Meursault, you are a genius. Can you make arrangements with your team to put her on a plane with a guard and send her back?"

Meursault said, "Of course. Consider it done. "Tu as bien fait mon amie" (You have done well my friend.)"

Zoe Dog took the pack of Gauloises out of Titibomb's pocket and lit one up. She took a deep drag, turned her head up to the ceiling and blew out a cloud of smoke. "Waiter," she said. "I'll have anothe café latte. Oh, and a croissant."